Lost On You

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wasting-time-social-media

Lost On You

Sometimes I’m sure
All of my goodness is lost on you

You seem so much more comfortable
When I stick to your game
The one where we pretend
To poke our eyes out
Then spend all of our time rolling around in the mud
Until the mud obscures everything

It would be so much easier to stop telling you the truth
So, what would you like to hear today?

I am aware of all these months
Where so much time was spent and wasted
You seemed to enjoy reeling me in
With the sound of your voice
My patience and love have never been so sorely tested
And we failed the test that was US

It would be so much smarter to walk away
I try but I slip, I fall harder

You laid a carpet of fear
And you keep tugging at it
You want me to keep falling
Yet you want me to get up and walk away
It will never be a stable foundation no matter how you dress it up
But I want to try, I always want to try

It’s my nature
To hope and believe rain can fall from a cloudless sky and quench my thirst
I want to love, I always give you love
I think it’s my purpose
To hope and to know that every heart that’s been starved for love
Can be full and be free
Just as I would like us to be

I may dream, but I should know better
It is all lost on you

All of my goodness
All of the world’s goodness
Is lost on you, it’s lost to you
Because you enjoy the game
Of self deprecating, of saying you try to be a good person
When deep down you revel in being a shit

-LM 2013/2016*

*Since I haven’t been posting in some time I am combing through things I wrote and didn’t post and expanding on them a bit. This post was just a few lines in 2013. I’ve fleshed it out into a draft of a  full poem

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