This is LiLi, the cat of many names. AKA Merph, Merphy Brown, Captain Merphlepoof, Monkey Butt and of course, Grumpitha to name a few. Alas! If only I’d had a computer at the time, we could have beat that Grumpy Cat to fame and fortune!
Merph: What the hell Mom?
But wait. ALL our stuff is here so this isn’t a sleepover spot. But why is the bed surrounded by towers of boxes? I’m not sure if this is adequate or not. You sure are lucky that I’m so good with new environments!
Me: At least, “Stompy McStomperson” (our former loud housemate) isn’t here. Oh boy, but wait until you hear the garage door!
LiLi aka Merph: I don’t know what a garage door is, but MY bed is here which I will share with you. In other words I will sleep with my butt in your face.
Me: Okay. Thanks?
LiLi: By the way this “view” is fantastic!
The fantastic view!
Me: Don’t be mad. I can’t figure out where your food bowls and your toys are. I just checked with my client and she says I didn’t leave them behind. Maybe they are in the trunk of the car.
LiLi: This is most inadequate. I demand that you go find them at once!
Me: Maybe when it stops raining. I just changed my clothes. The ones I was wearing are soaking wet.
LiLi: What is it about, “At Once!” that was not clear?
Me: How about I make the bed?
LiLi: I not purr now.
Me: Tough love. Tough love.
Once again, trapped under a kitty.
It turns out that Merph is completely nonplussed by our bedroom being over the garage. That big noisy gate doesn’t even make her ears twitch. Frankly, it’s soothing compared to all the noise at the last few places we lived. The rain sound is not the best, no roof, just water slapping pavement, but it’s not the worst either. It’s nicer when I close the window.)
(A little while later)
Merph: You find my food bowls yet?
Me: It’s still raining. I have to go look in the car.
Merph: Inadequate. Most Inadequate!
Me: Besides, how can I do anything when you are on my lap?
Merph: Magic! Duh.
Me: I can’t even make the bed because you won’t move.
Merph: I helping!
Me: Cats seriously have a strange idea if what, “helping” means.
Merph: Bowls now?
(And later that day….)
Me: (finally) Merph, I found your food bowl, your crunchies and your toys.
Merph: Eh. I’m busy sitting in this basket.
Put down a basket, even a smooshed one, and voila, in goes a cat! It must be in their DNA.
Me: Loooook, I filled your water bowl!
Merph: Yeah, I might get to that later.
Me: OK then, I’ll just put this catnip away.
Yes, and this is me, a short while after the movers left. And yes, those are boxes, boxes and still more boxes! I confess, it’s been a year and some still aren’t unpacked.
-LM 2016 / 2017